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Since we have no kink yet today heres a write up of very recent events. Enjoy, and feel free to. After a week of planning and gathering a few small items of contraband, during the small hours of this day 29, Project AssGrass was both activated, and failed miserably in short order. I, the poster known as The Kraken to be from this point referred to as Team, was the only team member to survive the ordeal. What follows is a graphical account not suitable for younger readers. The disaster that was to occur faced its first omen of ill repute during a reconnaissance mission to the loo. Team noted with a sudden rising sense of dread that the one known as Nurse Nazi was making a rare night shift appearance. Initial contact with the enemy was truncated by use of tactical combat maneuver "sudden loss of balance" Team successfully broke off the skirmish by suddenly pretending to need to concentrate more on sense of balance as the journey to the bathroom was continued with much less in step. Bravo Team failed to respond to communication attempts and requests for confirmation of Nazi presence and speculated shift end. An hour later saw the hopes of millions dashed when Team was discovered with the previously mentioned contraband, and was "shoo'd" back to bed after confiscation. A small amount of face was preserved by performing tactical combat maneuver "Shaking Fist" during which Team shook fist mightily and with great menace at the retreating back of the stern Catholic Nurse Nazi and ed out "I'll get you next time, Gadget!!!!!" Bravo Team was apparently unsuccessful in locating the confiscated bottle of beer and small snack bag of potato crisps for retrieval, as no contact of any kind was achieved or attempted. Deliberation with the Military Tribunal took place at approximately and the decision was made to activate Project AssGrass sans contraband. Another exploratory reconnaissance mission to the loo revealed no Gestapo to be roaming the halls of the prison-like facility. Bravo Team failed to report any enemy activity taking place anywhere.