30something women... ( lengthy, but sincerely asking for input)
Hello. I've been frustrated with something lately and thought I'd run it past the diverse group of possible dating partners on this . I'm a fit SWM, 38 years old. I'm successful, , honest, communicative, romantic, etc. All of the "good guy" traits, but I'm not a pushover. I still have a bit of my edginess left from my (ish) youth. I'm not bad looking either. :-) I definitely have dated my share, and because I am seriously looking to fall in love and make it last, I try to stick to women in their 30s. I think it has a better chance of lasting forever if we're of similar ages. I want the real thing. I want someone to be my ultimate partner, I want us to be hopelessly in love and live to make each other happy. I'm kind of a hopeless romantic, lol. I still believe it's possible. It has to be. My last serious relationship ended about 10 months ago. I guess I was feeling a bit burned out about the whole dating thing, because since then I've shied away from potential heartbreak. Just wanted it to be lighter. For that reason, I branched out into the 20 something age bracket. By my own standards and many others, the last girls that I've dated should have been "way too " for me. Their respective ages - 20, 22, and 24. I expected childish drama and sexual cluelessness and I expected them to try to use me financially. None of that was the case. These women were emotionally and sexually generous. Drama free and laid back. Our times together were full of and exploration. No one tried to manipulate me into spending money on them. No one had a sense of entitlement, no one started trying to bark orders at me and tell me to hold this, get that, etc. In fact, more than once, I was moved to tears when they expressed such sincere desires to make me happy however they could. I think you know where I'm going with this. I'm trying not to be bitter and please don't be offended. This post is not a rant, it is a question. ( Yes a long question! Haha!) Of the many, many 30 something women that I have dated in the past ten years, none of them were very good people. They were selfish and entitled, emotionally unstable, passive , etc. It seemed that they get off on the power that comes from creating bullshit and misery. They expected me to provide every meal, every laugh, every idea. They are contributing nothing positive and are never pleased. They lay back in "pillow " and put forth no effort in the bedroom. In fact, that same self indulgence every part of life with them. Pouty, foot stomping arguments, and and manipulations, etc. These are intelligent accomplished women, yet still like this in their personal lives. After all of that typing, my one word question - Why? I KNOW that there MUST be good women in my age bracket. I KNOW it! Why can't I find them? I look at my female friends and family in that age group and frankly, I see all those same negative traits. What happened in our generation to make those the most common type of women? And please god, someone tell me where to find a woman that is a good match for me and also a good person! I've tried clubs and volunteering and and every possible dating or pick up , bars, grocery stores, libraries, lol. I'm realizing how VERY long it has been since I met someone truly worthwhile and with long term potential and it actually frightens me. No kidding. Were the good ones all married off years ago? Did something happen culturally that taught women of our age to be terrible? Can that be unlearned? I really am looking forward to intelligent feedback and perhaps even a dating lead or two. Please do not hesitate to type as much or as little as you'd like! 
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