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Everyone becomes suspect (both spouses), because of the epidemic of false accusations that has become a female "tactic" in divorce. And the Courts are aware of this. So, I'm skeptical, OP. I'm skeptical that you are practicing your story on an forum, and I have good reason to be skeptical. Once I gave my spouse an ultimatum, she spent the next years trying her mightiest to create a violent situation in which she could be characterized as a victim of domestic violence. What she hoped to gain was custody and support. What she got was smacked-down by the judge, both attorneys, the mediator, our, and our friends and neighbors. You? I was smart enough to have witnesses and documentation. And I was, sadly, forced to never be alone with her without witnesses . or I would simply run out into the driveway when she attacked. Not saying that you are doing that, just that this happens ALOT with impending divorce and custody issues. When a female starts stressing "control issues", there is generally a psyche element involved. Just sayin'. And the "control issue" usually bides in the one who is doing the accusing. I infer from your post that you have created the scenario in order to gain "control" and leverage over your Ex, and perhaps you ought to be looking at yourself rather than continuing to use the as leverage in custody and visitation issues.